You Are Missing Out on Your Own Growth

Hey Beyonder! 👋

Last week, something strange happened in a small room filled with people twice my age.

I saw myself through my parents' eyes. Through my relatives' eyes. And for the first time, I understood something that had been invisible to me all along.

When I was younger, I was the quiet kid who never spoke around family. Last week, I was the person they all turned to for advice. The transformation happened so slowly I never noticed it- until suddenly, it was impossible to miss.

The Unexpected Spotlight

I traveled all the way from Chennai to Tirunelveli last week for something that meant the world to me — my dad's new business launch.

It's a small setup called "Car Takers" (clever name, right? Like caretakers, but for cars!). He's starting this service to help with Teflon coating, matte finishes, and basically extending the life of people's vehicles. Just him and one employee taking the first step.

We invited a close circle- some pastors and family friends- for a small function with food and blessings.

While waiting for my uncle to arrive, something unexpected happened. My parents played one of my YouTube videos on self-confidence for everyone in the room.

There I was, suddenly watching myself speak alongside ten other people- all of them over 40, while I'm just in my twenties.

Seeing Your Own Impact

There's this weird thing about pouring your heart into something- you get so close to it that you can't see what it truly is.

I had spent hours recording, editing, and worrying about that self-confidence video. But sitting there, watching it alongside people who raised me, I wasn't seeing mistakes or things I could have done better.

I was seeing faces light up with recognition. I was seeing nodding heads and quiet "hmms" of agreement. For the first time, I could actually see my words landing somewhere important.

I'd put together this piece about building self-confidence- pulling from books, studies, and personal experience. But until that moment, I'd never truly appreciated the depth of what I'd created.

The video wasn't just surface-level advice. It was substantial. It was helpful. And most importantly, it was actually working.

I could see it in their expressions, that moment of recognition when information clicks and becomes insight.

People have messaged me before saying my videos helped them, but there's something profoundly different about witnessing that impact in person, in the same room, breathing the same air.

From Silent to Giving Advice

The thing that shook me most wasn't just seeing my content work. It was seeing how differently people treated me.

The same relatives who once patted my head and asked about school grades were now leaning in when I spoke. The same people who used to talk over me were now pausing to hear my thoughts.

As a teenager, family gatherings meant becoming invisible. I'd shrink into corners, convinced that anything I said would sound childish or naive. My strategy was simple: just nod, smile, and wait until it was time to go home.

Yet there I was last week- the same person, but completely transformed.

These same relatives who once knew me as the quiet kid were now asking for my advice. They valued my perspective. They wanted to hear what I had to say.

I found myself helping my dad's new employee with Excel basics, giving her a pep talk about approaching work, and sharing insights with relatives who genuinely wanted my input.

The contrast was striking: from the child who wouldn't speak to the adult whose words carry weight.

What Changed? Everything and Nothing

Looking back, I realized something profound about growth:

It happens so gradually that we rarely notice it ourselves. But others — especially those who haven't seen us in a while- can spot those changes in an instant.

The confidence I was teaching others about in that video? I had been quietly building it in myself all along, one small step at a time.

But it took that moment- sitting among family, watching myself speak through a screen- to truly recognize how far I'd come.

The Mirror We Never Look Into

Sitting there in that room, I realized something about progress that no self-help book had ever taught me.

We're terrible judges of our own growth.

Day by day, we don't notice the small shifts. The slightly stronger voice. The marginally clearer thoughts. The incrementally better delivery. It's like watching grass grow- stare at it all day and you'll swear nothing's happening.

But then someone who hasn't seen you in months walks in, and suddenly they're looking at a whole different landscape.

That moment when you hear yourself speak and think, "Hey, that actually makes sense."

When you can stand behind your own words with conviction.

When you recognize that you've become the person you once needed.

Your Challenge This Week

Here's what I want you to try:

Look back at something you created months or even years ago. It could be a post, a project, or even just a message you sent someone.

Read it with fresh eyes. Notice how you've grown since then. Appreciate the journey from who you were to who you are.

And then ask yourself: What would the people who knew me before think of me now?

Sometimes, the greatest measure of growth isn't how far you've come, but how visible that journey has become to others.

Has someone ever pointed out growth in you that you hadn't noticed yourself? How did it make you feel? Hit reply and let me know— I'd love to hear your story!

Growing alongside you,
Epaphra

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